Aussie Jingle Bells

It’s hard to believe it’s almost Christmas again, isn’t it? It doesn’t seem like that long ago since we were wrapping gifts and singing Christmas songs last year. 2009’s gone by so quickly. Or maybe I’m just getting older.

I enjoy Christmas but for different reasons than I used to. I’m not religious anymore but I still enjoy the spirit of the season and the message of peace and good will. It’s the little things about Christmas I enjoy most; seeing the lights and decorations in the city, spending time with family and friends. That’s what Christmas is about to me.

To help get into the Christmas spirit this year I thought I’d post a fun Christmas song, like I did last year. This is my take on Jingle Bells, one of my favourite Christmas songs. I rewrote it to reflect a typical hot Aussie Christmas. It turned out quite well in the end.

In researching it I actually learnt a lot about the song. Apparently Jingle Bells was actually written in 1857 for Thanksgiving, not Christmas. Which makes sense when you think about it as modern Christmas celebrations didn’t start until later. Also there are actually four verses to Jingle Bells, which I didn’t know; you rarely hear the last two.

In any case, I hope you enjoy it. And have a wonderful festive season. πŸ˜‰

Aussie Jingle Bells

Dashing through the house
In an old shirt and one shoe
Running late again
And you need the loo
Front door starts to ring
As the guests arrive
Bringing lots of gifts and pressies
Up the front drive

Oh jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Your family’s gathered round you
On a warm Christmas day (hey!)
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Santa says g’day
Oh what fun it is to spend
Christmas the Aussie way

Now the pressies are unwrapped
We’re sitting by the tree
Lights are all turned on
Looks pretty as can be
We talk about old friends
And have a glass of wine
While the kids play with their toys
Out in the sunshine

Oh jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Your family’s gathered round you
On a warm Christmas day (hey!)
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Santa says g’day
Oh what fun it is to spend
Christmas the Aussie way

Soon it’s two o’clock
We’re by the barbeque
Eating snags and prawns
And drinking beer too
Grandma’s made the cake
It’s a little dry
We try to eat it with one hand
While we’re busy swatting flies

Oh jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Your family’s gathered round you
On a warm Christmas day (hey!)
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Santa says g’day
Oh what fun it is to spend
Christmas the Aussie way

The light is getting dim
It’s almost time to go
We take a family snap
Under the mistletoe
The kids are fast asleep
We’re singing Christmas songs
Don’t you wish Christmas day
Could last all summer long!

Oh jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Your family’s gathered round you
On a warm Christmas day (hey!)
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Santa says g’day
Oh what fun it is to spend
Christmas the Aussie way

Oh what fun it is to spend
Christmas the Aussie way!

Australians All Love Ostriches

I had another post planned for today but I couldn’t let the WordPress upgrade go by without saying something. I’m a little confused. I don’t hate it but I wish they’d given us some warning. It caught me by surprise and I spent about two hours having to fix my widgets after everything disappeared and then getting used to the interface; if I’d known I’d have copied everything first to be safe.

I’m torn on the upgrade. I like the new features; the gallery and being able to upload several images at once is a big improvement and I’m warming to the layout. The main reason I’m confused is I don’t see why it was necessary to do the upgrade so quickly. Most users aren’t going to know how to use the new features right away; a gradual introduction (like the way themes are added) would have been more successful, in my opinion, and allowed people to adjust.

The main thing I don’t like is that the edit comment link has disappeared from the dashboard; you have to click on the avatar every time to edit it and that’s a pain. Also the font is smaller but overall I don’t mind the new version… I just wish they’d waited a bit longer and ironed out some of these problems first. And the blog surfer.

I spent so long looking at the new features and fixing problems that I haven’t had time to finish the post I’d planned. So I thought I’d post some of the strange search terms from my blog instead. I call them Googleages after Alynda’s old posts and some are bizarre (and not just the grammar). Kind of like my blog, don’t you think? πŸ˜‰

One of my favourites is this one: sulz define. I don’t know how we could possibly define sulz… she’s funny, interesting, talented… sulz is sulz. It’s just weird that the search ended up on my blog instead of sulz’s. Wouldn’t you go to the blog which actually has sulz in the title? Or maybe that’s just me.

Let me know if you have any favourites. πŸ™‚

  • unique ideas for a million dollars
    Ah but if I told you then it wouldn’t be unique now, would it?

  • australians all love ostriches
    A line in our national anthem is often misheard as “Australians all love ostriches”. It’s true, though, we do love ostriches… perhaps too much…

  • new job new sleep pattern no need for al
    OMG! You’re going to kill Al! Why?

  • two words that don’t make sense together
    Actual reenactment. Think about it; there’s an oxymoron if I’ve ever heard one. Insane logic and pretty ugly. Recorded live‘s another one.

  • cj is special in a bad way
    Finally, someone who gets me! Deep down I make Voldemort look like a muppet.

  • i want to hold you until i die
    But we only just met. Can’t we have more time?

  • i waste too much time dreaming of you
    I told you, I need more time… it’s not you, it’s me…

  • you occupy my thoughts, dreams and hopes
    Stop pressuring me! Look, the truth is, there’s someone else… Keri. She’s an ostrich.

  • more sleep helps you get longer fingers?
    No idea what post that search must have turned up. I assume it’s not true… if it is I really need to get rid of this insomnia.

  • youre only afraid of death when you real
    I have no idea what that means. You’re not afraid of death if you’re a ghost?

  • cj is gone forever
    No, I’m still here. See?

  • drink myself to happiness poetry
    I don’t know what’s more disturbing – the drinking to happiness bit or the idea that my poetry might drive someone to drink!

  • Is it cut the muster or cut the mustard?
    Cut the mustard, obviously. They mixed it up with to pass muster which is similar. I just liked it that they started with a capital.

  • we make smiles happen
    You’ve been hanging out with the poetry guy, haven’t you?

  • shia labeouf’s penis
    I have no idea where that came from. I mentioned Shia LaBeouf once about Indy 4 and suddenly I’m running a porn blog! πŸ˜‰

Now this is how to accept an award

Here’s a question for you. You’ve just been told that you’ve won one of the most prestigious awards in the world. How do you react? Are you overwhelmed? Are you gracious? Is it one of the most amazing moments in your life? Or is your first thought, “Oh Christ…”?

That was Doris Lessing’s reaction when she was told she’d just won the Nobel Prize for literature. It’s one of those classic moments. The media are waiting for her and can’t even let the poor woman get out of the taxi before they start asking her questions. As it turns out, the Nobel committee hadn’t told Lessing she’d won; in this day and age you’d expect an email or a text to get through first – hell, even FedEx or a pigeon – but no, Doris Lessing is left to hear about it from the media.

And I love her reaction. It’s not just that she doesn’t want a fuss, or her obvious contempt for literary prizes; it’s the audacity of the media to show up uninvited on her doorstep. She’s been out with her son and all she wants is to get back home and they can’t even wait to let her get out of the taxi properly? And just when you think it couldn’t get any stranger, what on Earth is going on with her son? Is he wearing a vegetable as a sling?

But isn’t this the way we all wish we could act sometimes? To have that old-fashioned arrogance and contempt for what your peers think of you? Sure, there’s a lot to be said for accepting an award with grace… but it’s not as much fun. I remember when I was 1st in English and was given a few other awards in school, my first thought was “Oh wow”; my second was “Fuck, I’ve got to climb all those stairs”. I didn’t say it and I smiled and said my thank yous… but believe me, there were a lot of stairs. πŸ˜‰

What’s really interesting is how the media have used her comments and made them sound completely different. This from news.com.au: “I’ve won all the prizes in Europe, every bloody one,” she said as she stepped out of a taxi carrying groceries. β€œI’m delighted to win them all, the whole lot. It’s a royal flush.” Wait – is this the same Doris Lessing? Is this even the same interview? At least the beginning of it is, but you wouldn’t know it.

I like Doris Lessing’s works but I must admit I was a little surprised she won. She was awarded it for her life’s work; as the Nobel committee put it, Lessing is “that epicist of the female experience, who with scepticism, fire and visionary power has subjected a divided civilisation to scrutiny”. My problem isn’t that she doesn’t deserve the prize, she does; it’s that strictly speaking the prize isn’t meant to be awarded for a life’s work. It’s stipulated in Alfred Nobel’s will that the prizes are meant to be awarded to β€œthose who, during the preceding year, shall have conferred the greatest benefit on mankind”. The preceding year. Nothing there about a life’s work.

To me the best novel of the last year is Cormac McCarthy’s The Road. Nothing else comes close to it; it’s one of the most harrowing, painful and beautiful novels I’ve ever read. It would get my vote for the best novel of the last thirty years, not just the last year. And McCarthy’s life work is impressive as well; his work always speaks to the depths of humanity and darkness, life and death, and The Orchard Keeper, Blood Meridian, All the Pretty Horses and The Road make a very powerful reading list.

But Lessing has achieved so much in her career that she definitely deserves the recognition; it would be a shame to think she’d be another to never win the prize like Graham Greene. But there’s one thing that isn’t being talked about much regarding Doris Lessing. It’s the risks she’s always taken with her work, none more so than with Shikasta. For one of the most notable literary talents to go from writing classics like The Grass is Singing and The Golden Notebook to a space opera like Shikasta and the whole Canopus in Argus series was incredibly gutsy; in the 1970s mainstream fiction deplored science fiction (still does) and SF itself was a heavily male-dominated field. But Lessing didn’t care; she told the story she wanted to tell and along with Octavia Butler, Alice B. Sheldon (aka James Tiptree Jr.) and Ursula K. le Guin, transformed science fiction.

Now thirty years later Shikasta is considered every bit the classic it is. And Lessing still doesn’t seem to care. And that’s how she accepted her prize; on the street, with every bit the contempt she’s always exhibited. I can’t help but laugh. Isn’t it fabulous? πŸ™‚